Catching Up

So much has happened since my last post.  Our house has been through it’s share of ups and downs during the first part of 2016.

My hope was that the New Year would bring new and wonderful change.  I was right, change did happen…some new and not so wonderful, and some new and wonderful.

We must take the good with the bad.

The children I have still living here…lost jobs, one is back full time and the other is part time, so things are a bit better along those lines.  I am still looking for something to do that will make money for the house, while being in the house, due to not being able to venture outside for any extended period of time.  It is very frustrating.

Illness came back with a vengence, and we all had our share.  I not only had the sick, but injuries from beatings I took, came back to haunt me.  My back…that was broken and never fixed (healed wrong), has been giving me fits…the Doctors want to put metal rods on each side of my spine…not something I want to venture into right now…so…I will deal with things, until I can no longer function, then do the surgery.

On the Wonderful side….My oldest is getting married in March and with that union comes a grandchild….WOW!  It is an amazing thing to think,that I am now a grandmother, and I must say, it is Fantastic.  Children are such good medicine.  I forgot what it was like to have a 2nd grader in the house.  To re-visit the imagination, energy, and pure innocence, is an amazing thing.  Brings back memories of when mine were that age.

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It is also a Huge incentive to work that much harder, to get out into this amazing world, so I can share the adventures a child that age brings.

So…if anyone out there has any ideas on how to bring money into my home, without leaving it…I would be grateful for the suggestions.

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Looking for work, like Snoopy…Thank you Mr. Schulz for this one!

I am also open to suggestions and comments on how to better deal with the PTSD and all its vile ways.

I hope 2016 is being good to you all, and I am grateful to all of you for hearing me!

I Love my Family and Friends, and want you all to know I appreciate all the support and help you give.

Thanks to all my Blog followers for hanging in there and being patient with my posts.  I appreciate you reading and Hearing, along with the comments.

I thank God above all for always being there for me, and may He Bless all of you!

Sincerely;

Bea Heard

 

2016 is Drawing Near

With 2016 just around the bend, I thought it would be a good time to reflect on the past year.

I have done many things that I thought were out of my reach…pushed myself to do things that were impossible just a year ago.

I am proud of my accomplishments this year, and Grateful to many people…Those who have helped me, encouraged me, stood by me through thick and thin, especially to all of you who give me strength and keep me focused by reading my blog along with your kind words to help continue my forward momentum.

In 2016, I hope to delve deeper into the things that scare me, and continue to become stronger, so I can heal what has been torn and broken for a very long time.

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I know the road will not be an easy one…the things I need to overcome sometimes seem too high to reach, but I know with the help of God, Family and Friends (both old and new)…anything is possible.

I will keep posting, writing, along with pushing myself to new heights… Hopefully hearing, and helping others through my journey!

Thanks to all of you for hearing me…I love hearing you too, and hope we will be able to hear each other throughout the new year.

Good Luck to all in 2016 and God Bless!

Thanks for Hearing!

Sincerely;

Bea Heard

December View From My Window

This is it…My December view from the window….

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I the flowers are lovely.  They make me smile, and what little snow we have left from our first and only snow of the season, I think, makes a nice background.

Suffering with the P.T.S.D. as I do, it really helps to have something fun to look at, while I’m inside doing so many things.

My goal is to one day, get out there and decorate around the entire fence… baby steps.

I spoke about the nativity that my friends gave us so long ago, and how I put it up every year, first, without the baby Jesus…so, I thought I would take a picture or two, so you could see the wonderful gift for yourself.

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This is the picture of the Hand-Carved nativity…made from Olive Wood from the Holy Land!

The next picture needs a bit of a set-up…My youngest saw the nativity…as pictured above, and said…where is the night, and where are all the stars in the sky (he was not satisfied with the star at the top)?

Then he went to his room, came back with a dark blue ribbon he had saved, and some of the star tinsel from the small tree we had put in their room, he placed it carefully on top of the nativity….it has been there ever since…

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You may notice an ornament on the side…well that was my middle childs contribution to the nativity…it opens and you can put things into it…he said it was a gift for the Baby Jesus…like the wise men gave…so we put it on the side where the wise men are.

Now you know the full story of the Nativity in our house….it is such a special way to remember friends, past years, the children when they were young, and a way to do good deeds for others…all the while celebrating this wonderful season of Christ’s birth.

Let me know some of your traditions for whatever season you celebrate…I would love to hear you!

Thanks again for Hearing.

Sincerely;

Bea Heard

Baking Therapy

Baking things is one of my self-imposed Therapies…. It helps me to concentrate my thoughts into a single task.

I love kneading bread and shaping rolls/ loaves, and bread baskets.  wpid-100_2587.jpg  These are just a few of the items I Love to make…displayed in a bread basket…the basket is as much fun to make as it is to eat.

This time of year, I get to do more of it than I usually do, for more than one reason… at this time of year the baking warms the kitchen…and is great for the Holiday tables, along with gift giving.

I learned Baking Therapy from my Mom…and Grandmother (her Mom)… Mine would make bread for our meals…and all types…my Grandmother made the Best rolls (of which we have yet to duplicate)…and I remember one time when I was at her house…the smell of fresh-baked bread in the air.  She was punching down the bread and said with a smile…”I love that part…gets out all my frustrations,” and she was not light handed when she punched it down.  She was right…it is a great way to get out aggression and the warmth of the dough was helpful to her arthritis.

My Children Love fresh-baked bread, as a matter of fact…my oldest only likes it fresh from the oven…or a few hours old. He usually asks when he comes over and sees the bread…”How long ago did you make that?”   If I made it more than two hours past…he tends not to want any .  Don’t get me wrong…he will eat it if he really wants some…but he says he does not enjoy it as much…wants me to call him when I’m making it so he can get it fresh (spoiled Boy)!

I guess it is my Therapy, because if I am stressed, worried or having a hard time dealing with the struggles with my abusive past, it gives me a focus, and makes the house smell delicious, along with the memories of baking with my Mom and Grandma…it is an all around Stress-reducer.

So…if you are stressed…Try Baking…not only can you calm down…but you get to enjoy the fruits of your labor afterwards!

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Enjoy your Day!!!  Happy Baking and Thanks for Hearing!

Sincerely;

Bea Heard

THANKFUL REFLECTIONS

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Since November is in full swing and it is the month for being thankful for all that we have…I decided to reflect on childhood memories.

I have so many wonderful memories of childhood celebrations.  My Mom is the one to thank for that.  This time of year brings back memories galore.  The holidays were made magical for me and my siblings.  My Mom could make something out of virtually nothing, and I am very Grateful to her for that.

Our Holidays started in October with Halloween… wpid-fb_img_1444514303926.jpg

Where she would decorate the house inside and out…we would get to carve pumpkins…make goodies (we could make treats to give out to those trick-or treating, at that time) and we sometimes had Halloween parties with the entire family…but we would all dress up…even if you were too old to go trick-or-treating…just dressing up to hand out candy or going to school was fun.

Then on to Thanksgiving…wpid-screenshot_2015-11-11-08-42-59.jpg   I remember the house filled with all kinds of yummy smells…it was nice to come home from school or just playing and smell baked bread, cookies, pies, etc..  Sometimes she would be making things to give to others…teaching us that even when you don’t have much, giving was a great blessing.

I remember Aunts, Uncles, Grandparents, Cousins…all getting together to have a special Thanksgiving dinner.  Everyone would bring something to contribute and because the family was (and is) so big…we usually had to have it at a larger place than a house…church halls, Someones clubhouse, or just in a relatives house…even if it means more than one room.  I’m always thankful for being together with family!

After Thanksgiving comes Christmas…wpid-screenshot_2015-11-11-08-45-00_1_1.jpg Yes it was and is a special time for our family to celebrate the Birth of Jesus…but it was also made Magical because of all the other things that Christmas brings…My Mom would bring all the things from the Cedar Chest she had…and when we would come home…before even seeing the things she had put up…we could smell the cedar and know that it was Christmas time…There were many things she would set up…The tree of course, but much more…elves in the tree…a Winter village on top of the cedar chest…figurines around…the Nativity all lit up…and the smells…oh the wonderful smell of Christmas time.  Mom made candy…big event at our house.  This was not for us to eat…though we did get a nibble or two…but to give to others as gifts…along with cookies…breads…etc., and of course Santa…always remembering that the gifts he brought represented those given to the Christ Child so long ago.

After that…New Years…wpid-screenshot_2015-11-11-08-45-57_1.jpg  What a day that was…We actually got to stay up past midnight…WOW!!!!  Sometimes we made it and other times some of us did not…it was always fun though…we would play games, listen to music (some of which Dad did not relish), and sometimes we would get together with family and friends and it was a big party!!  Like almost everyone in the country on New Years Eve…we would watch the Ball Drop on T.V., With Dick Clark! Then on New Years Day…we would eat leftovers from the night before…along with others freshly made and watch the football games together…so much fun to be had!

Now that is not the end of our holiday season…no…February came with cupid, hearts, flowers, etc…..wpid-screenshot_2015-11-11-08-46-39_1.jpg  and in our home Valentines was not just for Lovers…but a time to celebrate all those you loved.  We would make Cookies…oh those yummy cookies with icing and your name in the middle of the heart.   Mom would also make those cookies…tons of them…because we had a huge family.  She made them so we could give them for our valentines at school (again…when we could do things like that in school)  So we had a list of all the classmates…their names spelled correctly…and we would ice the cookies…Mom would write their names…we placed it on a paper Heart doily with a bit of icing…and then on cookie sheets…We could not wait to get to school to give out our valentines.

Then on Valentines evening…we would take the cookies we made for family and friends on special plates…drive to their houses…and leave the cookies on their doors…Knock or ring the bell…and run like the wind…so they could not see who brought them (like the did not know).  That was so much fun…the anticipation of going to the door and not getting caught…fun!!!

Now comes March…St. Patrick’s Day!!!  wpid-screenshot_2015-11-11-08-47-37_1.jpg  Mom would make sure that we all had something green on BEFORE, we went to bed the night before…so our siblings would not get to pinch us if they found us without green on (I have green eyes,I was always safe).  In the morning, the smell memories again.  This time coconut…yes you heard…coconut.  But what does coconut have to do with St. Patrick’s Day, you ask?  Let me explain…Mom would make green pancakes shaped like shamrocks, and green syrup…since maple syrup did not look good in green, she made coconut syrup and it was yummy!!!!  What a fun thing to look forward to each year.  Then we would have a traditional St. Patrick’s dinner later that day…something to look forward to.

Now you would think that was the end…but no…another month to celebrate came next.  Easter… wpid-screenshot_2015-11-11-08-48-25_1.jpg  And though this was the end of our Holiday Season…It was…as it should be…a New Beginning.  We would always go to church to celebrate the risen Christ.  The family would celebrate Easter with a Large Family Party (still going on to this day)..we would go…then to Grandmas house…everyone would bring something to eat…we would have an easter egg hunt…Egg shaped cookies were made with our names on them (like the valentine ones) we had nests made of puffed wheat cereal and they were filled with treats…but more than anything else…we were with Family.

Now of course there were other holidays…The 4th of July, Memorial day, Veterans day, etc…throughout the other times of year…Any excuse to get together for a BBQ!

But whenever I think of the Holiday Season…I think of seven months of Magic…Thanks Mom!!!!

I always wanted to be like our Mom…Sadly, she is one of a kind.  Though I do follow through with many of the traditions (as do my siblings) I have not been able to duplicate for my children, the Magic I had.

Part of the reason is, that I made a choice in a partner I thought was the man I had been waiting for my entire life…one I could carry out traditions with for my own young family. But he was not what he seemed to be…so instead, I gave my children a life of abusive memories…ones I thought I had shielded them from, only to find out they suffered it as well.  But that is all I will say on that subject for now.

I was able to give my  children some of my Moms wonderful traditions…and they do remember them and look forward to them each year.

I’m Grateful to have these Memories and Traditions.  They meant so much to me then…and even more to me now!

Hope you all have a wonderful Thanksgiving season!

Thanks again for Hearing!

Sincerely;

Bea Heard

A Chill Setting In

The title of my post today denotes my figurative and literal feelings at this moment, let me explain….

In the literal sense…it is COLD outside…finally some of the still green leaves will lend a bit of color to my outdoor scene, before winter snow begins…I miss seeing the brilliant autumn colors of the eastern United States.

Some of the trees have a bit of color...but for the most part they are still green.

Some of the trees have a bit of color…but for the most part they are still green.

In the figurative sense…a chill set in thinking about the fact that I need to somehow venture outside these four walls of my P.T.S.D. cave to do a little work before winter.

Droplets of water...after yesterday's rain...but not frozen...Yet!!!

Droplets of water…after yesterday’s rain…but not frozen…Yet!

I need to get the hummingbird in and change the dead flowers for some silk winter ones, so I can see something pretty from the window…maybe silk autumn leaves first.

Then I need to get the Hummingbird feeder from the tree, so it will not freeze and meet the same demise as last years model.

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Not to mention the terracotta planters…the biggest of which did not see the soil, nor what I intended to plant in it…and the smaller ones, though perfect for halloween…need to have the dead plants attended to…then they need to come in so they will not crack in the winter cold.  Hopefully next year I can venture out to plant something beautiful…or tasty!

Sadly never filled.

Sadly never filled.

Sadly neglected.

Sadly neglected.

Last but not least is the hose that needs to be brought in so it will not freeze and the two outdoor faucets that need protective coverings, allowing them not to get frozen, crack and flood the basement.

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All this…taking of pictures to show you my intended duties are what put the figurative chill in me…because just taking the pictures frazzled my nerves.

I love Minion sayings!

I love Minion sayings!

That is why I put the above minion picture in…fits me to a “T”!

Then I have been going through the MOUNDS…and I truly mean MOUNDS of knit and crochet items, piling up on my writing area and around my rooms in bags, boxes (sorry for the poor pictures…lighting not so good in the early morning when these were taken), etc..

wpid-p_20151030_074813_hdr.jpg  Piled High… wpid-p_20151030_074844_hdr.jpg and More

wpid-p_20151030_074858_hdr.jpg It keeps on going…wpid-p_20151030_074832_hdr.jpgand after all this, I found one thing I did not complete…now I’m wondering exactly what it could be…wpid-p_20151030_074721_hdr.jpg ?????

In going through all of them…and the storage spaces (for items gently used that cold be sold, i.e., games, cooking items etc.).  I was hoping to have a Yard Sale.

But…you know…that means…GOING INTO THE YARD…WITH PEOPLE THERE!

So…it has been put off, weekend after weekend, until now it is colder, almost Halloween, and I’m debating if a Yard/open house would work.

I need to do something, because I’d like my writing space back.  Not that I do not love writing at the kitchen table, where I get to see the outdoors, but it is nice to separate the two…(Yes my brother, you were right).

So…I will try to rally my children, who will hopefully feel generous enough to help me for a day or two…both in getting the things done outside that need accomplished before the freeze…and in the Yard/open house I need to have, both to clear my space and make a bit of money!

Now… to set a date and push through another round of fears.

With God and my Family…I know it can be done.

Wish me luck!

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The above one is a saying I saw and had to post (found on Pinterest)…to inspire me and hopefully someone else along the way!

Thanks for Hearing!

Sincerely;

Bea Heard

Nice Visit From My Brother

I just had a wonderful visit from my Brother.  It was unexpected, and brightened my day.  He even brought this….

wpid-p_20151027_121823_hdr.jpg  Yea!!!!!!!!  He knows me so well…coffee fixes everything…well…almost!!!

He stopped by because he was on a break, and his work today took him close to my house.  He also brought pictures….from his camera, that I borrowed when my oldest proposed.  He even brought the thumb drive to download them for me…I’m so Blessed to have a Family like I do.  Everyone Loves and cares do much about each other.  We do, as all families, have our times when we don’t agree…but that is life. When it comes right down to it though, we would walk through fire for each other.

I thank God every day for my family and friends.  Without them, I would have never made it this far.

So this post was just to say Thanks to my brother and God!  My brother (and his son for putting the pictures on the thumb drive) for always calling, visiting, making me laugh when I least feel like doing so, for always being there.  And Thanks to God for bringing him into my life.

Thanks to all of you for reading and Hearing me!

Sincerely;

Bea Heard

October 18th Celebration…Our Freedom Day!

HAPPY OCTOBER 18th

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That is what we say to each other in our family…every year on this day.  Why, you might ask?  Well, it is a special day to my children and myself because that is the day we were all Free of the Abuser in our life.

All the time and waiting for court cases to end, and waiting for the ability to move to be with family…the wait was over…that was the day we walked into the courthouse bound…and came out free!

Breaking free of the chain of Abuse!

Breaking free of the chain of Abuse!

During that day at court, our abuser (their Father) gave up his parental rights…he did so to gain a lighter sentence.  That day the Judge told my children that now I was their Mother and their Father…she joked that I could scold them in one room and then take them into another room and do it again.

I could not wipe the smile off their faces…nor did I want to…It had been a very, very long time since I had seen that level of happiness in them.

We decided to go to the store and get something special for dinner that night.  You know… I don’t even remember what we got for the meal, but I do know, my oldest saw some champagne glasses…since it was Autumn, the tops of the glasses were a gold color and the stems were clear.  It was mentioned that we should get them to celebrate…So we bought four of them, along with a bottle of Sparkling Cider ( could not have the real stuff until they grew up a lot more ), along with the food and headed home.

The Halloween in the corner takes 2nd place to our October 18th Celebration Glasses.

The Halloween in the corner takes 2nd place to our October 18th Celebration Glasses.

That night we shared a meal in the dining room, and toasted with our sparkling cider…then one of my children (don’t remember who at this time) said… “we should do this every year.”

And that is how our October 18th celebration came about…We have since celebrated it, and promised each other that no matter what or where we are on that date…we would come together, spend the day…just the four of us, and have a toast in those same glasses…then with care, we pack them up, place them in a box that is marked for the occasion and put the box carefully away on the shelf until the next year.

I just wanted to share with you the Love I feel for my children, they are the true Hero’s in our story…because they were so very courageous in coming forth with things that were so very hard.  I commend them for doing so…I could not do it for myself, I truly thought I had shielded them from the abuse, and that they were not enduring it…when I finally found out, because one of my Brave children came forward, I found the courage to do something about it.  I finally became the mother they needed. I finally opened my eyes, and realized that they had seen, heard, and endured, more than I was willing to admit.

So again I say…to my children…HAPPY OCTOBER 18th, and may we share many, many more together!   I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!!!

Thanks for Hearing!

Sincerely;

Bea Heard

Preparing for Halloween

I realize that I already did a blog at the beginning of the month about Halloween..but that was before my Wonderful Aunt came to visit me.

This lady is so very talented, crafty and comes to visit me bringing an array of things to do or decorate with.  We got together recently and she brought a project that was sooooo much fun.

You know the Fairy pot craze…

Not this cute little version...No...we need something more befitting the occasion...

Not this cute little version…No…we need something more befitting the occasion…

Well, because we both love Halloween…she thought it would be fun to do a Halloween themed version.  It was Great.  We made a dirty mess…and had food, drinks (cranberry, lime, and sprite…no spirits…we will save that for Halloween), laughed, and made fun Halloween Fairy pots.

Then we set about decorating…such a good time shared with a Beautiful lady.  I’m so blessed to have Family and Friends who support me, even in my craziest of times.

I’m going to show pictures of our Mess, the finished product and the corner of my Kitchen that is now decorated with wonderful things she gave to me.  I Thank her for all the kindness she always shows to me…for the passion she exudes for any holiday, and for making life a little more fun to be in.  I Love you!!!

Dirty kitchen counter and Floor...

Dirty kitchen counter and Floor..

Finished pot.

Finished pot.

A closer look at our Witches, Ghouls and Gobblins.

A closer look at our Witches, Ghouls and Goblins.

I'ts spot in the living room, along with a Witches broom...Ok, It's my mode of transportation...Ha, Ha!

Its spot in the living room, along with a Witches broom…Ok, It’s my mode of transportation…Ha, Ha!

Now a look at the corner in my Kitchen, where I have the perfect view of all the fun Halloween decorations…

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It is better at night, because they all light up or glow in the dark…

wpid-img_1591.jpgwpid-img_1592.jpgwpid-img_15941.jpgwpid-img_1595.jpgwpid-img_1593.jpg The progression of color is almost Mesmerizing…perfect for this occasion!!!

Now we cannot forget the wonderfully fun cup she brought me…

wpid-img_16111.jpg  and the fun treats.wpid-img_16121.jpg

Of course I don’t like eggs…they are the scariest part of this thing…But I made them after she left…for my children…who devoured them.  We found it on Pinterest and we both decided to make them for dinner.

She also brought a book.  She knows I love to read and write.  I will read just about any genre.  This one is a children’s book about Halloween by Barbara Robinson, and it is Titled “The Worst-Best Halloween ever.

Just so you know what to look for...Great for young and old alike.

Just so you know what to look for…Great for young and old alike.

The book is about the Herdman Kids, who love to cause mayhem on Halloween and every day for that matter.  But this year the Mayor cancels Halloween, so the town will not be subject to the Herdmans disastrous ways….but will it work?  You will have to read the book to find out.  I promise anyone who reads this will find the child in them again.  It is a fun read.  Pick up a copy and read it yourself or read it with your children. You won’t be disappointed.

All in all, it was a delightful day.  A Great way to De-Stress…My journey continues.

Thanks for Hearing this BOO-tiful tale.

Sincerely;

Bea Heard.

Our B.A.C.A. Angels

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I have to take a few minutes to tell you about a group of people who saved our family.  These were people who I did not want to let into our lives.  The reasons were many… some of the reasons were… I did not want more people who could potentially betray us, as had been done in the past. I did not want to explain our situation again, as it had been done so many times, we were all tired of trying.  I did not trust many people to do what they said they would do, as we had already been told we would be helped by people in the court system…only to be pushed further back.  And Last…I did not want a group of “BIKERS”, around my children…to me, they were a scary bunch of people.  Don’t get me wrong…I have family and friends that are motorcycle riders, and who ride with other motorcycle riders, but a Group of Bikers….there has always been a stigma surrounding them.

I WAS WRONG!!!!!!  This organization turned out to be the biggest group of Angels we have ever seen.

This and all pictures taken from Google, the B.A.C.A. website, and Youtube.

This and all pictures taken from Google, the B.A.C.A. website, and YouTube.

I first heard about them from my family, who were miles away from us, and yes, we felt all alone…even though we had friends who supported us, it was not like having your family there.  My mother called me and said she had been in contact with a group of people who could help us.  As she started talking about them, I couldn’t believe that MY MOM, was telling be to associate myself with a group of Bikers.  I told her I did not want to do it.  She gave me the phone number of a person I needed to contact, and I don’t know what happened to it, but I lost it…not by accident, I’m certain.

After many court dates about a number of things, and my children being more and more afraid to do things…we did not go out much, other than school or work, and they did not play in the yard anymore, for fear that their abuser would take them.  It was a living Hell!

One day, as I was coming home from work with my children, I noticed a biker at the end of the street…it was a unsusal site on that rural stretch of road.  It unnerved me a bit, because I was worried about our abuser, and the threats that had been made due to an upcoming court date.  I went in the house and called my Mom, who along with a brother was coming to be with us during court.  This date was not for about a month, and I was just talking to her about my concerns.  She said. “Don’t be afraid, they wont hurt you.”  I was in shock…my Mom knew about some biker being on my street.  I asked if she had sent them, and told her she had no right to do it.  She said that as a Mom, I should be able to understand the helplessness she felt, thinking her child was in danger, and she only wanted to do something to help.

Well, that did it…I listened to her, as I realized I was not the only mother afraid for her children.  She told me she was in contact with them (B.A.C.A.) and told them about the threats that were given to us…she also said that they had a few  members in the area that would ride by once in a while to make sure things were ok…but, they could not come in and talk to us, or do anything except call the police if something were amiss, unless we contacted them and allowed them to come in.

After she explained that they would not even stop at the end of our driveway without our permission…it made a big difference to me, I realize that they respected our situation and would respect our boundaries as well.

That night I made the call and 2 days later was the first visit.  You have to know that I was so very scared to allow anyone into our lives, but they explained what they were there for, and what they did, and I felt that if my children could feel safe, have a good nights sleep, and testify in court, it would be worth it.

We kept our curtains shut, and it looked like no one lived at our house most of the time.  We were inside, waiting for them to come, and heard the thunderous sound of the bikes,well before they came down our street.  We all looked at each other, and I could tell that my children were a little apprehensive.  I said, “It’s ok, they are coming to help us.”  I did not even know if I believed my own words.  Then we heard them come into the driveway, and slowly but surely it became silent, as each of the bikes found a place and they turned them off.  We did not see them come, as we just stood in the living room, curtains closed, waiting.

Then the knock came at the door, and I hesitantly went to open it.  When I did, I saw a very Tall Menacing looking man standing there.  I wondered if I had made a mistake in my decision to allow them to come.  He was soft-spoken when he introduced himself, and asked us all to come out and meet the group.  When we did, my children clung to me, as I have never seen them do before.  The leader spoke to them by getting down to their level.  He let them know that they were there to protect them, and that they were a family, and wanted my children to be one of their family. Then they gave them each a jacket with a patch on the back and told them that they were now part of the B.A.C.A. family, and when they wore those jackets, it let all members of B.A.C.A. know that they were a B.A.C.A. child.  They gave them a few other things, and Each of my children, slowly warmed up to them…they even put them on the bikes to see how it felt to be on a motorcycle.  They loved it.

of course this is not my child...the message is the same.

of course this is not my child…the message is the same.

Then the leader asked me to go into the house so we could take care of some paperwork and talk about what they would be doing….WHAT…GO INSIDE AND LEAVE MY CHILDREN OUTSIDE???  I did not say those words, but you could see that he knew what I was thinking, because he said…”You can open those curtains and watch them from the window.”  He promised, that they would be safe, and if I felt uncomfortable, I could come back out with them.

I can’t tell you why, but I felt at ease at that point.  This never happened, especially with strangers, and I never trusted people I did not know with my children…Because even people I did know, turned out to be the ones to hurt them.

We went in, and as we were talking, a Miracle happened…I heard laughter…something I had not heard from my children for quite some time, and when I looked up…They were playing…actually playing, and it continued…it started getting dark and it seemed they did not even notice.  I started to cry…then I felt a hand on my shoulder and one of the angels said to me.  ” I Promised you would be safe, and I think your children know it too.”

He was right…they did so much for us in that small space of time, and it only continued.  They visited often, my children came out of their shells, and felt safe, we went to court among an entourage of bikers and my children stood tall.

This is the type of thing you see everywhere, when B.A.C.A. takes a child to court.

This is the type of thing you see everywhere, when B.A.C.A. takes a child to court.

It was a long road, because court was cancelled, postponed, etc., many times, but every time… B.A.C.A. was there, every step of the way…Even when the District Attorney was hesitant to allow them in the courtroom.  We had a practice run, where the District Attorney, and the Children went into the courtroom and he told them where they would be and what they would do…he asked B.A.C.A. to stay outside the courtroom when they were practicing, and they were very nervous.  One of my children had a really hard time…kept fidgeting, and not concentrating on the questions, and even stuttering…then the District Attorney asked if they wanted their friends to come into the courtroom…it was a resounding YES.  After they came in, my child smiled, and stopped fidgeting, and when asked the questions, was able to state the answer clearly and without stuttering.  The District Attorney turned to me and said… “They can stay!”

This is a group of B.A.C.A. members supporting the children...they usually take the seats furthest to the front...in our case...they took up most of the courtroom, and surrounded the victims supporters.

This is a group of B.A.C.A. members supporting the children…they usually take the seats furthest to the front…in our case…they took up most of the courtroom, and surrounded the victims supporters.

That was it…they were allowed into the courtroom, and it made all the difference.

I guess what I want to say with this post is  THANK YOU!  Thanks to Chief for founding such a wonderful group. Thanks to all the members around the world who take time from their own schedules, both personal and work to help children get through some of the worst times of their lives, and for giving them their strength back.  This group of selfless people change lives.

If you need them, or if you know of someone who needs them  go to http://www.bacaworld.org   –   You will not be sorry that you did.

You do need to have an open court case for them to get involved, but they can also give you information and help you find the people to contact if you do not have an open case.

This is a screenshot of the website. www.bacaworld.org

This is a screenshot of the website.
http://www.bacaworld.org

We were lucky enough to meet Chief one time, and my children were in heaven.  I was so grateful.  I hope all our B.A.C.A. Angels know how much they changed our lives.  We are still friends with one of the angels who came into our lives, and we cherish the friendship.  We are also grateful for all those who came from all over to help us…your sacrafices and selfless acts will never be forgotten.

Thanks for hearing us!

Sincerely;

Bea Heard