HAPPY THANKSGIVING!

Just want to Thank everyone publically today, as it is Thanksgiving!  My Family, Friends, both old and new, and my blogging community.

I know this is not Thanksgiving, The celebration, for all of you out there, but every day can be a day of Thankfulness.

I am Grateful to God for providing so many things…Yes I have had many struggles, and am continuing to battle some, but I know God is there, and he has given me many people along the way to help me and mine through.

I am just hoping and praying that everyone out there has a warm, happy, joy-filled day, surrounded by people you Love!

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The above saying by Melody Beattie, I think sums it all up!

Thanks for Hearing!

Sincerly;

Bea Heard

October 18th Celebration…Our Freedom Day!

HAPPY OCTOBER 18th

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That is what we say to each other in our family…every year on this day.  Why, you might ask?  Well, it is a special day to my children and myself because that is the day we were all Free of the Abuser in our life.

All the time and waiting for court cases to end, and waiting for the ability to move to be with family…the wait was over…that was the day we walked into the courthouse bound…and came out free!

Breaking free of the chain of Abuse!

Breaking free of the chain of Abuse!

During that day at court, our abuser (their Father) gave up his parental rights…he did so to gain a lighter sentence.  That day the Judge told my children that now I was their Mother and their Father…she joked that I could scold them in one room and then take them into another room and do it again.

I could not wipe the smile off their faces…nor did I want to…It had been a very, very long time since I had seen that level of happiness in them.

We decided to go to the store and get something special for dinner that night.  You know… I don’t even remember what we got for the meal, but I do know, my oldest saw some champagne glasses…since it was Autumn, the tops of the glasses were a gold color and the stems were clear.  It was mentioned that we should get them to celebrate…So we bought four of them, along with a bottle of Sparkling Cider ( could not have the real stuff until they grew up a lot more ), along with the food and headed home.

The Halloween in the corner takes 2nd place to our October 18th Celebration Glasses.

The Halloween in the corner takes 2nd place to our October 18th Celebration Glasses.

That night we shared a meal in the dining room, and toasted with our sparkling cider…then one of my children (don’t remember who at this time) said… “we should do this every year.”

And that is how our October 18th celebration came about…We have since celebrated it, and promised each other that no matter what or where we are on that date…we would come together, spend the day…just the four of us, and have a toast in those same glasses…then with care, we pack them up, place them in a box that is marked for the occasion and put the box carefully away on the shelf until the next year.

I just wanted to share with you the Love I feel for my children, they are the true Hero’s in our story…because they were so very courageous in coming forth with things that were so very hard.  I commend them for doing so…I could not do it for myself, I truly thought I had shielded them from the abuse, and that they were not enduring it…when I finally found out, because one of my Brave children came forward, I found the courage to do something about it.  I finally became the mother they needed. I finally opened my eyes, and realized that they had seen, heard, and endured, more than I was willing to admit.

So again I say…to my children…HAPPY OCTOBER 18th, and may we share many, many more together!   I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!!!

Thanks for Hearing!

Sincerely;

Bea Heard

Our B.A.C.A. Angels

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I have to take a few minutes to tell you about a group of people who saved our family.  These were people who I did not want to let into our lives.  The reasons were many… some of the reasons were… I did not want more people who could potentially betray us, as had been done in the past. I did not want to explain our situation again, as it had been done so many times, we were all tired of trying.  I did not trust many people to do what they said they would do, as we had already been told we would be helped by people in the court system…only to be pushed further back.  And Last…I did not want a group of “BIKERS”, around my children…to me, they were a scary bunch of people.  Don’t get me wrong…I have family and friends that are motorcycle riders, and who ride with other motorcycle riders, but a Group of Bikers….there has always been a stigma surrounding them.

I WAS WRONG!!!!!!  This organization turned out to be the biggest group of Angels we have ever seen.

This and all pictures taken from Google, the B.A.C.A. website, and Youtube.

This and all pictures taken from Google, the B.A.C.A. website, and YouTube.

I first heard about them from my family, who were miles away from us, and yes, we felt all alone…even though we had friends who supported us, it was not like having your family there.  My mother called me and said she had been in contact with a group of people who could help us.  As she started talking about them, I couldn’t believe that MY MOM, was telling be to associate myself with a group of Bikers.  I told her I did not want to do it.  She gave me the phone number of a person I needed to contact, and I don’t know what happened to it, but I lost it…not by accident, I’m certain.

After many court dates about a number of things, and my children being more and more afraid to do things…we did not go out much, other than school or work, and they did not play in the yard anymore, for fear that their abuser would take them.  It was a living Hell!

One day, as I was coming home from work with my children, I noticed a biker at the end of the street…it was a unsusal site on that rural stretch of road.  It unnerved me a bit, because I was worried about our abuser, and the threats that had been made due to an upcoming court date.  I went in the house and called my Mom, who along with a brother was coming to be with us during court.  This date was not for about a month, and I was just talking to her about my concerns.  She said. “Don’t be afraid, they wont hurt you.”  I was in shock…my Mom knew about some biker being on my street.  I asked if she had sent them, and told her she had no right to do it.  She said that as a Mom, I should be able to understand the helplessness she felt, thinking her child was in danger, and she only wanted to do something to help.

Well, that did it…I listened to her, as I realized I was not the only mother afraid for her children.  She told me she was in contact with them (B.A.C.A.) and told them about the threats that were given to us…she also said that they had a few  members in the area that would ride by once in a while to make sure things were ok…but, they could not come in and talk to us, or do anything except call the police if something were amiss, unless we contacted them and allowed them to come in.

After she explained that they would not even stop at the end of our driveway without our permission…it made a big difference to me, I realize that they respected our situation and would respect our boundaries as well.

That night I made the call and 2 days later was the first visit.  You have to know that I was so very scared to allow anyone into our lives, but they explained what they were there for, and what they did, and I felt that if my children could feel safe, have a good nights sleep, and testify in court, it would be worth it.

We kept our curtains shut, and it looked like no one lived at our house most of the time.  We were inside, waiting for them to come, and heard the thunderous sound of the bikes,well before they came down our street.  We all looked at each other, and I could tell that my children were a little apprehensive.  I said, “It’s ok, they are coming to help us.”  I did not even know if I believed my own words.  Then we heard them come into the driveway, and slowly but surely it became silent, as each of the bikes found a place and they turned them off.  We did not see them come, as we just stood in the living room, curtains closed, waiting.

Then the knock came at the door, and I hesitantly went to open it.  When I did, I saw a very Tall Menacing looking man standing there.  I wondered if I had made a mistake in my decision to allow them to come.  He was soft-spoken when he introduced himself, and asked us all to come out and meet the group.  When we did, my children clung to me, as I have never seen them do before.  The leader spoke to them by getting down to their level.  He let them know that they were there to protect them, and that they were a family, and wanted my children to be one of their family. Then they gave them each a jacket with a patch on the back and told them that they were now part of the B.A.C.A. family, and when they wore those jackets, it let all members of B.A.C.A. know that they were a B.A.C.A. child.  They gave them a few other things, and Each of my children, slowly warmed up to them…they even put them on the bikes to see how it felt to be on a motorcycle.  They loved it.

of course this is not my child...the message is the same.

of course this is not my child…the message is the same.

Then the leader asked me to go into the house so we could take care of some paperwork and talk about what they would be doing….WHAT…GO INSIDE AND LEAVE MY CHILDREN OUTSIDE???  I did not say those words, but you could see that he knew what I was thinking, because he said…”You can open those curtains and watch them from the window.”  He promised, that they would be safe, and if I felt uncomfortable, I could come back out with them.

I can’t tell you why, but I felt at ease at that point.  This never happened, especially with strangers, and I never trusted people I did not know with my children…Because even people I did know, turned out to be the ones to hurt them.

We went in, and as we were talking, a Miracle happened…I heard laughter…something I had not heard from my children for quite some time, and when I looked up…They were playing…actually playing, and it continued…it started getting dark and it seemed they did not even notice.  I started to cry…then I felt a hand on my shoulder and one of the angels said to me.  ” I Promised you would be safe, and I think your children know it too.”

He was right…they did so much for us in that small space of time, and it only continued.  They visited often, my children came out of their shells, and felt safe, we went to court among an entourage of bikers and my children stood tall.

This is the type of thing you see everywhere, when B.A.C.A. takes a child to court.

This is the type of thing you see everywhere, when B.A.C.A. takes a child to court.

It was a long road, because court was cancelled, postponed, etc., many times, but every time… B.A.C.A. was there, every step of the way…Even when the District Attorney was hesitant to allow them in the courtroom.  We had a practice run, where the District Attorney, and the Children went into the courtroom and he told them where they would be and what they would do…he asked B.A.C.A. to stay outside the courtroom when they were practicing, and they were very nervous.  One of my children had a really hard time…kept fidgeting, and not concentrating on the questions, and even stuttering…then the District Attorney asked if they wanted their friends to come into the courtroom…it was a resounding YES.  After they came in, my child smiled, and stopped fidgeting, and when asked the questions, was able to state the answer clearly and without stuttering.  The District Attorney turned to me and said… “They can stay!”

This is a group of B.A.C.A. members supporting the children...they usually take the seats furthest to the front...in our case...they took up most of the courtroom, and surrounded the victims supporters.

This is a group of B.A.C.A. members supporting the children…they usually take the seats furthest to the front…in our case…they took up most of the courtroom, and surrounded the victims supporters.

That was it…they were allowed into the courtroom, and it made all the difference.

I guess what I want to say with this post is  THANK YOU!  Thanks to Chief for founding such a wonderful group. Thanks to all the members around the world who take time from their own schedules, both personal and work to help children get through some of the worst times of their lives, and for giving them their strength back.  This group of selfless people change lives.

If you need them, or if you know of someone who needs them  go to http://www.bacaworld.org   –   You will not be sorry that you did.

You do need to have an open court case for them to get involved, but they can also give you information and help you find the people to contact if you do not have an open case.

This is a screenshot of the website. www.bacaworld.org

This is a screenshot of the website.
http://www.bacaworld.org

We were lucky enough to meet Chief one time, and my children were in heaven.  I was so grateful.  I hope all our B.A.C.A. Angels know how much they changed our lives.  We are still friends with one of the angels who came into our lives, and we cherish the friendship.  We are also grateful for all those who came from all over to help us…your sacrafices and selfless acts will never be forgotten.

Thanks for hearing us!

Sincerely;

Bea Heard

PUDDLE-JUMPING

How  long has it been since you went Puddle-Jumping?

PUDDLE-JUMPING

The fun kind…not the darting to and fro to avoid the puddles, and the stepping off the curb into a puddle…

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But the actual happy faced, jumping with both feet, not caring if you are soaked to the bone…Puddle-Jumping!

The kind that brings back memories of childhood, and the times when it was so simple and fun.

Well, I have not done it in a very long time.  But I was lucky enough to witness such an event last week.  I even stepped out of the box I live in, to not only speak to the man and his daughter, but ask if I could take a picture.

I saw them from my usual vantage point…

It was raining much harder than the day I took this picture.

It was raining much harder than the day I took this picture.

and I heard the father (my window was open…enjoying the fresh rain filled air) say One, Two, Three, then I heard a splash.   I looked up and saw a happy little girl and her Dad, having a lot of fun…they did it over and over at the corner puddle, that had grown to fill most of the street.  Then they walked on, counting and jumping often.

I was filled with happiness, and thoughts of childhood, enjoying the memories that flooded in.  I picked up my i-Pod, and ran (without thinking) to the front door…they had made it to around the part where my gate is by then, and were counting and jumping again.  When they finished that jump…I said. “Thanks for reminding me how much fun that can be!”  He smiled and said “Sure.”  I then asked him if he would mind if I took a picture of him and his daughter jumping in the puddles.  So I could have a constant reminder.  He agreed, and continued with his child.  I took the picture and reluctantly closed the door, as they continued on their way.

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I know the picture is not that clear, that is because of the rain, and the fact that I had just spoken to a complete stranger, on my front porch taking pictures, and at the point the picture was taken, I had my back to the open spaces.

So…I’m just wanting to thank that Dad and his little girl for bringing a little childhood back into my life.  Giving me the courage to step outside these four walls for a moment. Above all, remembering how it felt to be care-free.  The memories he is making for his child will be ever remembered.

Later that day, the rain had cleared and the sun was shining…I had at that point closed my blinds, and retreated into my cave…still happy, but recovering from my little adventure.  Two of my children came in the house and had such confused looks, that I had to laugh a bit.  One asked me, “Did you take a picture of a man and his daughter today?”  They both looked at me with dis-belief on their faces, as I said “Yes!”

“NO!” was the resounding reply, then I couldn’t hold it in, I broke out laughing! They couldn’t believe I had ventured out, let alone talk to, and take a picture of a complete stranger…they know me well.

I showed them the picture, and told them the story of why I did it, then they pulled out a piece of paper, told me that his email was on it and would I mind sending him the picture so he could show his wife.

Now I have more to be happy about…not only did they make my day, but now they have a picture to mark their adventure.  I’m glad that I summoned the courage to go out and take the picture.

I guess what my post is about most today, is this….it does not have to be Puddle-Jumping, it can be blowing bubbles…

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gazing at the stars, or finding things in the clouds…

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We just need to keep dreaming, like we did when we were young, and we need to stop thinking about age so much…as the father did for his daughter…just Jump!

C.S. Lewis said…

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We all need to remember that, and do more to keep our dreams and goals alive…if even for a small space of time each day.  It can really make a big difference.

Who knows…Like they did for me…it could make a difference in the lives of others as well.

Keep Puddle-Jumping!

Thanks for Hearing!

Sincerely;

Bea Heard