HAPPY THANKSGIVING!

Just want to Thank everyone publically today, as it is Thanksgiving!  My Family, Friends, both old and new, and my blogging community.

I know this is not Thanksgiving, The celebration, for all of you out there, but every day can be a day of Thankfulness.

I am Grateful to God for providing so many things…Yes I have had many struggles, and am continuing to battle some, but I know God is there, and he has given me many people along the way to help me and mine through.

I am just hoping and praying that everyone out there has a warm, happy, joy-filled day, surrounded by people you Love!

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The above saying by Melody Beattie, I think sums it all up!

Thanks for Hearing!

Sincerly;

Bea Heard

THANKFUL REFLECTIONS

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Since November is in full swing and it is the month for being thankful for all that we have…I decided to reflect on childhood memories.

I have so many wonderful memories of childhood celebrations.  My Mom is the one to thank for that.  This time of year brings back memories galore.  The holidays were made magical for me and my siblings.  My Mom could make something out of virtually nothing, and I am very Grateful to her for that.

Our Holidays started in October with Halloween… wpid-fb_img_1444514303926.jpg

Where she would decorate the house inside and out…we would get to carve pumpkins…make goodies (we could make treats to give out to those trick-or treating, at that time) and we sometimes had Halloween parties with the entire family…but we would all dress up…even if you were too old to go trick-or-treating…just dressing up to hand out candy or going to school was fun.

Then on to Thanksgiving…wpid-screenshot_2015-11-11-08-42-59.jpg   I remember the house filled with all kinds of yummy smells…it was nice to come home from school or just playing and smell baked bread, cookies, pies, etc..  Sometimes she would be making things to give to others…teaching us that even when you don’t have much, giving was a great blessing.

I remember Aunts, Uncles, Grandparents, Cousins…all getting together to have a special Thanksgiving dinner.  Everyone would bring something to contribute and because the family was (and is) so big…we usually had to have it at a larger place than a house…church halls, Someones clubhouse, or just in a relatives house…even if it means more than one room.  I’m always thankful for being together with family!

After Thanksgiving comes Christmas…wpid-screenshot_2015-11-11-08-45-00_1_1.jpg Yes it was and is a special time for our family to celebrate the Birth of Jesus…but it was also made Magical because of all the other things that Christmas brings…My Mom would bring all the things from the Cedar Chest she had…and when we would come home…before even seeing the things she had put up…we could smell the cedar and know that it was Christmas time…There were many things she would set up…The tree of course, but much more…elves in the tree…a Winter village on top of the cedar chest…figurines around…the Nativity all lit up…and the smells…oh the wonderful smell of Christmas time.  Mom made candy…big event at our house.  This was not for us to eat…though we did get a nibble or two…but to give to others as gifts…along with cookies…breads…etc., and of course Santa…always remembering that the gifts he brought represented those given to the Christ Child so long ago.

After that…New Years…wpid-screenshot_2015-11-11-08-45-57_1.jpg  What a day that was…We actually got to stay up past midnight…WOW!!!!  Sometimes we made it and other times some of us did not…it was always fun though…we would play games, listen to music (some of which Dad did not relish), and sometimes we would get together with family and friends and it was a big party!!  Like almost everyone in the country on New Years Eve…we would watch the Ball Drop on T.V., With Dick Clark! Then on New Years Day…we would eat leftovers from the night before…along with others freshly made and watch the football games together…so much fun to be had!

Now that is not the end of our holiday season…no…February came with cupid, hearts, flowers, etc…..wpid-screenshot_2015-11-11-08-46-39_1.jpg  and in our home Valentines was not just for Lovers…but a time to celebrate all those you loved.  We would make Cookies…oh those yummy cookies with icing and your name in the middle of the heart.   Mom would also make those cookies…tons of them…because we had a huge family.  She made them so we could give them for our valentines at school (again…when we could do things like that in school)  So we had a list of all the classmates…their names spelled correctly…and we would ice the cookies…Mom would write their names…we placed it on a paper Heart doily with a bit of icing…and then on cookie sheets…We could not wait to get to school to give out our valentines.

Then on Valentines evening…we would take the cookies we made for family and friends on special plates…drive to their houses…and leave the cookies on their doors…Knock or ring the bell…and run like the wind…so they could not see who brought them (like the did not know).  That was so much fun…the anticipation of going to the door and not getting caught…fun!!!

Now comes March…St. Patrick’s Day!!!  wpid-screenshot_2015-11-11-08-47-37_1.jpg  Mom would make sure that we all had something green on BEFORE, we went to bed the night before…so our siblings would not get to pinch us if they found us without green on (I have green eyes,I was always safe).  In the morning, the smell memories again.  This time coconut…yes you heard…coconut.  But what does coconut have to do with St. Patrick’s Day, you ask?  Let me explain…Mom would make green pancakes shaped like shamrocks, and green syrup…since maple syrup did not look good in green, she made coconut syrup and it was yummy!!!!  What a fun thing to look forward to each year.  Then we would have a traditional St. Patrick’s dinner later that day…something to look forward to.

Now you would think that was the end…but no…another month to celebrate came next.  Easter… wpid-screenshot_2015-11-11-08-48-25_1.jpg  And though this was the end of our Holiday Season…It was…as it should be…a New Beginning.  We would always go to church to celebrate the risen Christ.  The family would celebrate Easter with a Large Family Party (still going on to this day)..we would go…then to Grandmas house…everyone would bring something to eat…we would have an easter egg hunt…Egg shaped cookies were made with our names on them (like the valentine ones) we had nests made of puffed wheat cereal and they were filled with treats…but more than anything else…we were with Family.

Now of course there were other holidays…The 4th of July, Memorial day, Veterans day, etc…throughout the other times of year…Any excuse to get together for a BBQ!

But whenever I think of the Holiday Season…I think of seven months of Magic…Thanks Mom!!!!

I always wanted to be like our Mom…Sadly, she is one of a kind.  Though I do follow through with many of the traditions (as do my siblings) I have not been able to duplicate for my children, the Magic I had.

Part of the reason is, that I made a choice in a partner I thought was the man I had been waiting for my entire life…one I could carry out traditions with for my own young family. But he was not what he seemed to be…so instead, I gave my children a life of abusive memories…ones I thought I had shielded them from, only to find out they suffered it as well.  But that is all I will say on that subject for now.

I was able to give my  children some of my Moms wonderful traditions…and they do remember them and look forward to them each year.

I’m Grateful to have these Memories and Traditions.  They meant so much to me then…and even more to me now!

Hope you all have a wonderful Thanksgiving season!

Thanks again for Hearing!

Sincerely;

Bea Heard

Our B.A.C.A. Angels

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I have to take a few minutes to tell you about a group of people who saved our family.  These were people who I did not want to let into our lives.  The reasons were many… some of the reasons were… I did not want more people who could potentially betray us, as had been done in the past. I did not want to explain our situation again, as it had been done so many times, we were all tired of trying.  I did not trust many people to do what they said they would do, as we had already been told we would be helped by people in the court system…only to be pushed further back.  And Last…I did not want a group of “BIKERS”, around my children…to me, they were a scary bunch of people.  Don’t get me wrong…I have family and friends that are motorcycle riders, and who ride with other motorcycle riders, but a Group of Bikers….there has always been a stigma surrounding them.

I WAS WRONG!!!!!!  This organization turned out to be the biggest group of Angels we have ever seen.

This and all pictures taken from Google, the B.A.C.A. website, and Youtube.

This and all pictures taken from Google, the B.A.C.A. website, and YouTube.

I first heard about them from my family, who were miles away from us, and yes, we felt all alone…even though we had friends who supported us, it was not like having your family there.  My mother called me and said she had been in contact with a group of people who could help us.  As she started talking about them, I couldn’t believe that MY MOM, was telling be to associate myself with a group of Bikers.  I told her I did not want to do it.  She gave me the phone number of a person I needed to contact, and I don’t know what happened to it, but I lost it…not by accident, I’m certain.

After many court dates about a number of things, and my children being more and more afraid to do things…we did not go out much, other than school or work, and they did not play in the yard anymore, for fear that their abuser would take them.  It was a living Hell!

One day, as I was coming home from work with my children, I noticed a biker at the end of the street…it was a unsusal site on that rural stretch of road.  It unnerved me a bit, because I was worried about our abuser, and the threats that had been made due to an upcoming court date.  I went in the house and called my Mom, who along with a brother was coming to be with us during court.  This date was not for about a month, and I was just talking to her about my concerns.  She said. “Don’t be afraid, they wont hurt you.”  I was in shock…my Mom knew about some biker being on my street.  I asked if she had sent them, and told her she had no right to do it.  She said that as a Mom, I should be able to understand the helplessness she felt, thinking her child was in danger, and she only wanted to do something to help.

Well, that did it…I listened to her, as I realized I was not the only mother afraid for her children.  She told me she was in contact with them (B.A.C.A.) and told them about the threats that were given to us…she also said that they had a few  members in the area that would ride by once in a while to make sure things were ok…but, they could not come in and talk to us, or do anything except call the police if something were amiss, unless we contacted them and allowed them to come in.

After she explained that they would not even stop at the end of our driveway without our permission…it made a big difference to me, I realize that they respected our situation and would respect our boundaries as well.

That night I made the call and 2 days later was the first visit.  You have to know that I was so very scared to allow anyone into our lives, but they explained what they were there for, and what they did, and I felt that if my children could feel safe, have a good nights sleep, and testify in court, it would be worth it.

We kept our curtains shut, and it looked like no one lived at our house most of the time.  We were inside, waiting for them to come, and heard the thunderous sound of the bikes,well before they came down our street.  We all looked at each other, and I could tell that my children were a little apprehensive.  I said, “It’s ok, they are coming to help us.”  I did not even know if I believed my own words.  Then we heard them come into the driveway, and slowly but surely it became silent, as each of the bikes found a place and they turned them off.  We did not see them come, as we just stood in the living room, curtains closed, waiting.

Then the knock came at the door, and I hesitantly went to open it.  When I did, I saw a very Tall Menacing looking man standing there.  I wondered if I had made a mistake in my decision to allow them to come.  He was soft-spoken when he introduced himself, and asked us all to come out and meet the group.  When we did, my children clung to me, as I have never seen them do before.  The leader spoke to them by getting down to their level.  He let them know that they were there to protect them, and that they were a family, and wanted my children to be one of their family. Then they gave them each a jacket with a patch on the back and told them that they were now part of the B.A.C.A. family, and when they wore those jackets, it let all members of B.A.C.A. know that they were a B.A.C.A. child.  They gave them a few other things, and Each of my children, slowly warmed up to them…they even put them on the bikes to see how it felt to be on a motorcycle.  They loved it.

of course this is not my child...the message is the same.

of course this is not my child…the message is the same.

Then the leader asked me to go into the house so we could take care of some paperwork and talk about what they would be doing….WHAT…GO INSIDE AND LEAVE MY CHILDREN OUTSIDE???  I did not say those words, but you could see that he knew what I was thinking, because he said…”You can open those curtains and watch them from the window.”  He promised, that they would be safe, and if I felt uncomfortable, I could come back out with them.

I can’t tell you why, but I felt at ease at that point.  This never happened, especially with strangers, and I never trusted people I did not know with my children…Because even people I did know, turned out to be the ones to hurt them.

We went in, and as we were talking, a Miracle happened…I heard laughter…something I had not heard from my children for quite some time, and when I looked up…They were playing…actually playing, and it continued…it started getting dark and it seemed they did not even notice.  I started to cry…then I felt a hand on my shoulder and one of the angels said to me.  ” I Promised you would be safe, and I think your children know it too.”

He was right…they did so much for us in that small space of time, and it only continued.  They visited often, my children came out of their shells, and felt safe, we went to court among an entourage of bikers and my children stood tall.

This is the type of thing you see everywhere, when B.A.C.A. takes a child to court.

This is the type of thing you see everywhere, when B.A.C.A. takes a child to court.

It was a long road, because court was cancelled, postponed, etc., many times, but every time… B.A.C.A. was there, every step of the way…Even when the District Attorney was hesitant to allow them in the courtroom.  We had a practice run, where the District Attorney, and the Children went into the courtroom and he told them where they would be and what they would do…he asked B.A.C.A. to stay outside the courtroom when they were practicing, and they were very nervous.  One of my children had a really hard time…kept fidgeting, and not concentrating on the questions, and even stuttering…then the District Attorney asked if they wanted their friends to come into the courtroom…it was a resounding YES.  After they came in, my child smiled, and stopped fidgeting, and when asked the questions, was able to state the answer clearly and without stuttering.  The District Attorney turned to me and said… “They can stay!”

This is a group of B.A.C.A. members supporting the children...they usually take the seats furthest to the front...in our case...they took up most of the courtroom, and surrounded the victims supporters.

This is a group of B.A.C.A. members supporting the children…they usually take the seats furthest to the front…in our case…they took up most of the courtroom, and surrounded the victims supporters.

That was it…they were allowed into the courtroom, and it made all the difference.

I guess what I want to say with this post is  THANK YOU!  Thanks to Chief for founding such a wonderful group. Thanks to all the members around the world who take time from their own schedules, both personal and work to help children get through some of the worst times of their lives, and for giving them their strength back.  This group of selfless people change lives.

If you need them, or if you know of someone who needs them  go to http://www.bacaworld.org   –   You will not be sorry that you did.

You do need to have an open court case for them to get involved, but they can also give you information and help you find the people to contact if you do not have an open case.

This is a screenshot of the website. www.bacaworld.org

This is a screenshot of the website.
http://www.bacaworld.org

We were lucky enough to meet Chief one time, and my children were in heaven.  I was so grateful.  I hope all our B.A.C.A. Angels know how much they changed our lives.  We are still friends with one of the angels who came into our lives, and we cherish the friendship.  We are also grateful for all those who came from all over to help us…your sacrafices and selfless acts will never be forgotten.

Thanks for hearing us!

Sincerely;

Bea Heard

THE HEALING EMBRACE

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A Hug, is truly a Healing Embrace.  It has been scientifically proven that when you are hugged, your body releases endorphins that help reduce stress, and your body produces oxytocin, that helps to lower blood pressure.  There are numerous ways that the Embrace helps you to heal.

From the time we are born we need to be embraced.

From the time we are born we need to be embraced.

As you know if you read my post yesterday.  There have been troubling times in my life, not just for myself, but those I love. Today proved again what a Hug can do, and the healing powers it has.

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One of my children came up in the early hours, and only wanted to sit by me, and be held.  My child kept apologizing for just wanting to be there doing nothing but to be held, and I had to say. “You have nothing to apologize for…this is helping me, as much as it is helping you.”

It was only then, that I felt my child’s body relax.  For about 30 minutes, we sat there in a Healing Embrace.  We said nothing, but I could tell we both were slowly but measurably, feeling the effects of what we were doing.

Then when my child left there was, for the first time in a long time, a feeling of hope, renewed love, the warmth and comfort that was mutually felt was overwhelming to me.  I wept when I was alone…not in a sad despairing way, it was a feeling of relief. It felt as if we were finally breaking through to a new level.

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We all need human contact, as many have stated in the past…it is as necessary as breathing.  When we hug each other, whether it is to welcome someone, comfort someone, say goodbye, etc., we are giving our physical bodies a gift.  Helping our bodies to function better.  Like giving fuel to a vehicle…if you don’t have it, your body cannot run at its full potential.

Even getting and giving hugs to pets does the same thing…

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Not only do humans need this…but most living things crave contact.

We can learn something from a bear hug.

We can learn something from a bear hug.

So, Give a few hugs today…they say if you get a 30 second hug each day…it can lower your blood pressure by 20-30%…wow…that alone is a great reason to get and give hugs. Not to mention the feelings of caring, love, safety, warmth, comfort and joy that come with it.

For you, friends, family, everyone!

For you, friends, family, everyone!

Do yourself, your body, and those around you a favor, and have a good Hug today…every day…seek it out, make it a point to give and accept them.

From my own experience…I know it to be true…a Hug can truly be a HEALING EMBRACE!

Thanks for Hearing!

Sincerely;

Bea Heard